Tortured
by sylence in dark corners
Summary: My body sank to the floor, my eyes wide and my mouth open, like a fish out of water. I laid there for a minute before my back arched like a cat's off of the floor. I opened my mouth wide, taking a deep breath of air, and screamed.


**This was written for OneFrighteningLittleMonster123's Twilight fanfiction contest, under the category 'Best Tissue Grabber'.** **These are Edward's thoughts when he thought Bella to be dead in "New Moon". Enjoy!**

"She's dead, Edward."

Rosalie's voice went dead as I unconsciously dropped my little silver cell phone. For a few seconds, everything stopped. Time went dead, the world seemed to stop in it's tracks, as I waited for reality to set in again. And I kept waiting. It seemed like I sat there in that little attic forever before my brain started to catch up with reality.

Right before reality fully set in, a war seemed to be going on inside of me, between my brain and my heart. My brain was telling me, _"Wake up Edward! Get back to reality! Don't just sit there like a lump forever! Get up and get your grieving over, then go on with your life!" _

But my heart was telling me different. My heart was telling me, _"Don't Edward! Save yourself from the pain! Just walk to Volterra, and don't realize anything along the way. Stay in the dark."_

My brain won.

My whole body jerked as all of the memories came back, the memories that for almost a year I had been trying so hard to forget. The memories of my most beloved, now dead, Isabella Marie Swan.

The first time she said my name in her sleep, the same night that I realized I loved her. Telling her of what I am, and the way she just accepted it, without question. Her meeting my family for the first time. She felt so at home with me and my family. Our family. Bella had always loved my family as her own. Visiting our meadow, then our first kiss after that. Us making countless trips to see Carlisle for all her many falls. Us swimming in my stream by my house, even James, and the way she told me she loved me, even after I almost killed her sucking out the venom from her blood. How her eyes lit up when I first played her her Lullaby.

My breath went out in a big _woosh _as I fell to my knees, dry heaving for my loss. My body sank to the floor, my eyes wide and my mouth open, like a fish out of water. I laid there for a minute before my back arched like a cat's off of the floor. I opened my mouth wide, taking a deep breath of air, and screamed.

"No!" I cried, as dry sobs rocked threw my body. Reality had finally fully in. Bella was gone, and she took my life with it. She would never be there. She would never blush that beautiful scarlet red when Emmett teased her. She would never get lost in one of her books that she loved so much. Her eyes would nevermore sparkle with love as she looked at me, would nevermore glisten with tears. I would never be able to hold her in my arms as she slept. I would never kiss her red lips, never hug her soft, warm body against mine. I would never see her smile.

I don't know how long I cried, but I eventually stopped and went numb with pain. I picked myself up from off of the floor and grabbed my frantically ringing phone and shoved it into my pocket. Then I jumped out of the window, and walked into the streets.

I was once again filled with pain as I looked around. I saw babies hugging their mothers legs, pleading to get ice cream. I saw young couples, holding each other, to lost in their own world to notice anyone else. I saw many things as I walked thew the crowd to the airport, and everything I saw reminded me of my Bella.

I eventually made it to the airport, and I went up to the podium where they were selling tickets.

"One for Volterra, Italy, please." I told the women there. I was going to Italy for a reason. The Volturi where there, and maybe they could take away the pain that I was feeling.

After all, I wasn't really here. Not really. My body may be on earth, but my heart, mind, and soul where with my Bella. My body was the only thing keeping me from her.

I was going to fix that.

I got off of the plane and walked into the Volterra Airport. I walked right out again, because I had no luggage. I wouldn't be needing any. I made my way threw the back alleys, since the sun was out. Every once and a while, I would fall to the ground in pain emanating from my chest. But I would get up, willing myself forward with the reward of seeing my Bella again.

I eventually made it to the castle. I took a deep breath and walked threw the golden doors.

_Hold on Bella, I'm coming to get you. I'm coming back. _


End file.
